Zia Gul says husband expelled her from home with 5 children

Vida Qalandari
April 12, 2024

Zia Gul had been expelled from home by her husband with her five children after marrying another woman, now she has been dealing with many problems and says men should not do injustice with their women.

According to religious scholars, Allah (swt) has set special conditions for polygamy in the Holy Quran. Having multiple wives is conditional on ensuring justice among spouses.

Clerics say if a person cannot fulfill the conditions, he cannot marry another woman.

Women complain about injustice of their husbands.

Zia Gul, 35, (not real name), a resident of Bamyan province, said her husband married another woman after 11 years of their marriage.

She said: “Fifteen years ago, I married the man who never loved me, I was unlucky from the beginning and had a miserable life. He was always beating me and would always telling me that he would bring another woman r. Eventually he did what he would say and kicked me out of the house with five children”.

According to Zia Gul, she was three months pregnant when her husband expelled her away from the house and now her daughter is seven years old, but she has not seen her father.

After being expelled from home, she had to take care of her children. She worked in people’s houses from morning to evening to feed her children, but after spending sometimes, she had to come to Kabul due to lack of employment.

Years of work and hardships have weakened this woman, but she has to work for the survival of herself and children.

Zia Gul who currently lives in a mud room with her children in the Rishkhor area of Kabul, says that her two sons, aged 13 and 11, have become her arms, and every day they collect scarp from streets and alleys and sell it to meet household needs.

She saidt a man if married a second or third wife must ensure justice among his wives and provide maintenance for both families.

It is not only Zia Gul who complaints about her husband’s injustice, Palwasha, a resident of Kabul, has a similar complaint.

According to Palwasha, she was 18 when got married to a man with the consent of her parents and had a happy life, but her happiness lived short because her husband died in a traffic accident after 14 years together.

“He never left me in difficult situation;, we loved each other a lot, but when I lost him, my misfortunes began,” she added.

Palwasha has four children from her first husband and she would work in people’s houses until she met another man.

Palwasha said: “I met him in a house where I was a maid, he introduced himself to me like an angle and proposed me. I accepted his proposal to avoid miserable life, but I regret it and it was my biggest mistake in life because he already had a wife and had six children.”

“He swore that he had no wife and children. He told me his family was not here, He likes me and my children and he loves my children like his own. He deceived me and we tied the knot.”

Palwasha said she came to know weeks after her marriage that her new husband already had a wife.

“I wish I had not accepted his proposal. When my husband’s first wife came to know about our marriage, she came with her children and made a lot of noise. I felt bad…if I knew he had a wife, I would never have married him, Allah is witness that I didn’t want to ruin another woman’s life,” she explained.

Palwasha lives with her children in a rented house in Qala-i-Fatullah area: “My second husband was good at first, but slowly he changed and stopped taking care of us anymore.”

“A second luck can never take the place of the first. He (her husband) loves his first wife because she is from his tribe. Once my husband shouted at me that I am not even equal to the dust of his first wife’s foot,” she added.

She has a daughter and a son from her second husband and she is the breadwinner of all her children. She has been facing a host of problems and difficulties. For this reason, she engaged her 16-year-old daughter.

She stressed that men who married second and third wives should maintain justice between them.

Religious scholars: If a husband cannot do justice among wives, this is cruelty and is forbidden in Islam.

Mufti Shams-ul-Rahman Frotan, a religious scholar, told Pajhwok: “Regarding polygamy or having a second and third wife, the holy religious of Islam has established conditions. Allah Almighty says in Surah An-Nisa: “If you are not sure that you can maintain justice among your wives, then you cannot marry another wife.”

According to him, the first condition is to maintain justice among wives, second financial stability and the third condition of polygamy is physical ability. “Scholars say if someone has two wives, at night, this man should have the power to fulfill the legitimate desires of his wives.”

Rahman said the fourth condition was love and intimacy among wives.

He added: “And the fifth condition for spending night is to observe alimony and justice, meaning that if a person has two wives, he can spend one night with one of his wives and the other night with his other wife. It is important that he spends the night in the same room in the same bed with his wife.”

He added husband should consider justice and equality in women’s clothing and all other necessities and provide everything equally for his women or give them money to buy as they wish.

sa/ma

 

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